Monday Morning Chrysler New Yorker


As I said last week, the MPotD will come at you closer to mid-day.

The weather tried its best to even out the game, but only one team avoided the mistakes caused by the wind and rain. As you probably could’ve guessed, that team was the Steelers. And it was probably because Black and Golddust made it happen.

Listen, I don’t want to hear “It’s our time,” or “the Steelers have won 9 in a row, so the we’ll win this game” from Browns players or fans ever again. Last night’s win makes it 10 in a row, and we’re showing no signs of letting up on our “rival.” How about field a competitive team, kill the turnovers and hold on to the ball. The weather affected both sides, but our game plan and play-calling provided us the opportunity to work the clock and gain yard when needed. Sure, there were a few too many punts for my liking, but you take what you can get when gale-force winds are flying through the stadium.

At the end of the game, we still sit at 2-0, and the Browns have the script entirely flipped. Where’s that sexy pick of the Browns in the AFC North, football “experts?”

Ben. I’ll admit that I was anxious to see how he’d perform in the elements, and as fans, we were allowed to expect a pick or two. Especially with the shoulder. Asshole Shaun Rogers tried his best to knock Big Ben out with the late hit directly to the suspect shoulder, but Ben hung in, and was able to rest his injury by just handing the ball off a million times. It wasn’t a huge game by anyone’s count, but I’ll take 12 for 19 for 184 and a score most days of the week. 4 of 5 motorcycle helmets for Ben.

Willie Parker. Not really a standout game, but using the same logic as I did with Ben above, its nice to call a 100-yard game mostly meh. That 19-yard scamper late pushed him over the century mark, and he did enough to keep the Browns offense off the field. There were no real fireworks, but we’ll blame it on the rain (Milli Vanilli-style) for this game. 3.5 out of 5 motorcycle helmets.

Michael Phelps. Corona cans? I don’t know whether to mock your taste or compliment your ballsiness. A solid 3 of 5 helmets? Thanks for jinxing your boy Braylon.

Troy. The NFL is in for the second coming if Polamalu is 100% after the injuries he’s had the past few seasons. He’s been playing like a man possessed through two games, and I’m only hoping he can keep playing at this level without getting injured again. He saw that Anderson throw before Anderson threw it, and that pick was clearly the turning point in the game. Oh, and that flip over the O-line to disrupt the inside run was fantastic. Vintage Troy all night. 5 of 5 motorcycle helmets.

Santonio. Very quietly put up 94 yards and an 18.8 yard average. Without the weather, that might’ve been 150 and 20. His potential is crazy. 4 of 5 helmets.

Mewelde Moore/Mother Nature. I’ll forgive the muffed punts all night. But only for one night. Its a forgivable 2 of 5 helmets.

And props to guys like Bryant McFadden (starting in place of Deshea and making a huge pick), Silverback (who was on meth again) and the rest of the D. I love how the announcers always fawn over Jamal Lewis when he plays the Steelers, and our D shuts him down every game. Makes me all warm inside.

Anyone you wanna praise or call out? Leave ’em in the comments.

Iggles next week. I shall forget my respect for the Steagles for this one week.

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