Monday Morning Chrysler New Yorker



The smoothy smooths used a smooth smooth of smoothness to smooth out the unsmooth. Unsmooth as it smooth have been at smooth, the smooth made no smooth while the smoothers shoothed no smoothness. Smooth.

The unsmooth Steelers over the Seahawks, 24-0.

As you can see I was taken aback by Tony Siragusa’s in-game claim that the Steelers offense lacked a familiar smoothness or flow, while the score was 14-0 in favor of Pittsburgh and they were moving the ball again. Then again I’m taken aback by Tony Siragusa even being television-level-employable, so here we are.

Ben: His numbers were pretty efficient. 22 of 30 for 298 yards and a TD. He still has that “I’m still in preseason mode” lack of touch on a few of his early passes, and benefited from a weak Seattle D and receivers who snagged some high-thrown balls. But the efficiency was directly opposite of last week’s performance, and that’s all that really needs said. 4 of 5 motorcycle helmets.

RBs: They truly set the tone early. While Ben and his receivers were the stars later, Mendy and Redman opened up the game for them with their run success. They only had 66 and 49 yards respectively, but made Seattle respect the ground game. That’s perfect execution and a blueprint for a happy me. 4.5 of 5 motorcycle helmets.

Mike Wallace: You can’t stop him. By “you” I mean other teams. And you, too, I guess. 8 grabs for 126 yards and a TD. I think that’s 5 straight regular-season 100-yard games. He’s important. 5 of 5 motorcycle helmets.

Defense: Great bounce back game. MAYBE THEY AREN’T SO OLD, HMM? No turnovers (on both sides, strangely), but the Steelers D getting 5 sacks was huge. The last 2 games against the Seahawks have been 2 shutouts…yesterday and 2007, both at Heinz. 4 of 5 helmets. Get a pick or something. I’m needy.


[whoa sweet siragusa infinity shot! with bonus dirt dawson sighting! thanks to ape and bob]

Siragusa: The “smooth” stuff. And the being-completely-wrong-about-other-stuff stuff. His presence is absolutely meaningless. The complete opposite end of the smoothness spectrum from Keith Sweat.

Huge shoutout to Hines for that catch, too. You know which one. Steelers in Indy next week for Sunday Night Football. Let’s go.

(thanks to Doug for the banner pic)

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